The Elitist

October 19, 2008

Coffee is the Greatest Threat to Democracy

Filed under: Barack Obama, Science — The Elitist @ 2:57 pm
Coffee maker or mammogram?

Coffee maker or mammogram?

According to a Swedish researcher, drinking a lot of coffee can actually lead to a reduction in women’s breast size. Said the researcher, “Ccuffffee-a mekes buubeees teeny. Bork Bork Bork!”

This startling news has put the candidates on alert to the new threat facing America – small breasts. This mammary menace must not be allowed to continue. Breasts are the driving engine of our economy. Our television ads use them to sell products, our televisions use them to entertain, and our women use them to get what they want from men. America clearly values boobs. Starbucks must not be allowed to continue the assault on American values. Of course, some organizations want to downplay this threat, specifically the Itty-Bitty Titty Committee, or IBTC. Just what are Barack Obama’s ties to this rogue organization and why won’t he denounce them? – Coffee = Small Boobies


1 Comment »

  1. find

    Comment by jackie — October 19, 2008 @ 11:20 pm

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